Vengeance & Remission Read online

  #2 TRAFFIC JAM

  The weather in Britannia was different than everything Julia had experienced so far. Her origins were in Naples which lay between two notable volcanic regions, Mount Vesuvius and the Campi Flegrei. The climate was Mediterranean with mild, wet winters and warm, dry summers. Even emperors such as Claudius from the Julio-Claudian dynasty, the capable, efficient administrator and ambitious builder of many new roads, aqueducts, and canals, holidayed near the city. Julia loved the green, growing wild plants and the warm wind stroking the faces of the inhabitants. Additionally, she grew up with the Greek culture integrated into the Roman society. Naples was very well known and respected as lynchpin of Magna Graecia, a paragon of Hellenistic culture. Julia learnt Greek language and customs, while the city was expanded with elegant Roman villas, aqueducts, and public baths. She could declaim “Iliad” and “Odyssey” in Greek, too. Even though Virgil was traditionally ranked as one of Rome's greatest poets, she valued Homer's work higher. Virgil's “Aeneid” was respected as the national epic of ancient Rome, but its construction was built based on Homer's structure.

  Over five thousands legionnaires stayed in Eboracum permanently in an area of 50 acres which was the standard size for a legionary fortress with a standard square defensive boundary. The legionnaires provided trading opportunities for local people, and the business went so well that a civilian settlement grew around the fortress especially on its south-east side. Civilians also settled on the opposite side of the Ouse, initially along the main road from Eboracum to the south-west. There, few yards away from the main road, was a spacey, stone house, one of the biggest in the area. Marcus Lucius was sure the choice was made by Maxentius. He used to dream about having power and appropriate insignia to show off. Having lived all those years in her father’s house, Julia was used to so much space and luxury. Marcus Lucius didn't like the excess mother preferred. He liked the simplicity of living in the army. He liked the straight hierarchy and the plain order.

  The settlement in Britannia evolved into York, located in North Yorkshire, England. The inhabitants of Britain at this time spoke a Celtic language related to modern Welsh. Julia didn't understand them at all. The dialect was too different to all the languages she knew. She rarely had the opportunity to communicate with people outside of the villa she had to live in. She didn't mind to stay captured within the walls of the house. She felt better there than if she would have to go out and be involved into the social life of the society here. She wanted to keep her distance.

  In Britannia, she was confronted with conditions allowing convergence between moist maritime air influenced by the Atlantic Ocean and dry continental air. Most of the times, the temperature varied extremely, wasn’t stable, and the weather was unsettled with rainy periods more than once during a single day. The upcoming end of the summer didn't bring polar air masses yet, but there was enough wind to bring cold dry air from somewhere far, far away. Compared to Naples, Eboracum was definitely not sunnier throughout the year, but clearly wetter. Julia connected the wet touch with the perceived coldness. She was familiarized with the fact that the east coast of the Italian peninsula was not as wet as the west coast, and usually colder in the winter. However, Britannia seemed to be much colder and more unpleasant, even though it wasn’t even winter yet. It was the end of August and she was already freezing in her summer dresses. She didn't like it here so much. She tried not to show her attitude and hoped that nobody noticed it.

  When she moved into the stony, cold, windy house, she used to walk covered with a long, warm blanket. She didn’t have any proper dresses. She wasn't sure whether it was acceptable to buy new clothes. She didn't want to spend Maxentius's money. Her own assets were lost during the ambush. Apparently, the Barbarians stole two wagons and burnt three. Almost all slaves were killed and as consolation, almost all of Julia's slaves had already been sent to Britannia directly. It was Maxentius’ idea, who wanted to intimidate her by taking away everything that was familiar to her. He took her away from her father's home, he sent away her servants and then, he stole her feeling of security and her dignity. She became so insecure that she didn't feel well with any initiative growing in her t mind.

  Additionally, she wasn't sure what type of person Marcus Lucius really was and how he would react to her wishes. However, Marcus Lucius surprisingly paid attention and observed how Julia behaved. Apparently, he noticed that she didn't eat much. Therefore, he announced changes during the very first day in their new house. It was a short speech about meal times. Marcus Lucius ordered to eat breakfast shortly after sunrise. Dinner should be served briefly before sunset. Julia had to be present during both meals and so, Marcus Lucius could control her eating habits. When she didn't eat up everything, he kept sitting at the table as if he waited for her to decide whether she really gave up eating or whether it was just a pause. Julia felt his eyes on her and wasn't sure how she should react to it. She wasn't sure what he thought or felt about her.

  After the news was spread that Maxentius was attacked and injured, he got the time to rest and to recover. He had to go out once a day to greet the camp, which didn't take a lot of time, and he arranged with the local commander, Cornelius Fabius, that he might come back to the position, he was supposed to take over, with the beginning of winter, approximately in ten weeks. Cornelius, a man of age comparable to Julia's father, was a friendly, but rough man with a middle-strong handshake. He showed understanding for Marcus Lucius's arrival in a litter as well as for the bandaged head that kept Marcus Lucius's face partially hidden. The news that Maxentius got wounded in the head had already spread. Any bandage or helmet weren't any excuse, but a confirmation.

  The small escort was excused as well. Marcus Lucius didn't intend to raise attention. The command over the camp had to be cleared. Therefore, Cornelius met Marcus Lucius just within the closest circle. Cornelius wasn't sure what kind of arrangement would be made and he wanted to communicate the final outcome to all legionnaires after an understanding was settled. The talk had to be kept private. Informal character corresponded to the interest of both parties.

  Cornelius listened carefully to the short report and his facial expression became more serious with every word Marcus Lucius said. Appius’s guards should remain on Marcus Lucius's side, because they proved themselves as reliable, professional soldiers. Cornelius didn’t see anything wrong with it. He knew Appius and smiled minimally while he remembered the best trainer in the Roman empire. At the end, Cornelius slapped Marcus Lucius’s back gently, friendly and wished a getting well soon. With his goodbye, he invited himself to Marcus Lucius's villa to see Julia the same evening. He wanted to make sure that the girl he treated as almost his own daughter was fine. Marcus Lucius nodded and didn't see any problems with hosting Cornelius for a dinner. Cornelius didn't perceive any unwillingness or fear of Marcus Lucius.

  Cornelius was a talkative man. He produced a river of sentences and Marcus Lucius listened to every single word. Marcus Lucius learned that Cornelius and Julius Fabius were cousins and had the same grandfather. Cornelius's wish was to go to the Senate of the Republic and serve the empire with his wisdom and political skills. He obviously wanted to leave Britannia. There were many possible motives for this. Within the family arrangement, Cornelius could go to Rome and Maxentius's would get the position of the camp's general without any further earnings on the military field. Good connections could allow him to overstep some levels of command and responsibilities. It wasn't common, but if strong relationships were involved, every door could be opened in the way someone wanted it to. Marcus Lucius didn't accept such short cuts, but he was aware of their existence. It wasn't honourable and in his opinion showed more weakness than strong character. For Maxentius's bad luck, he didn't survive.

  Cornelius brought Marcus Lucius back to reality with a spontaneous expression of joy. He slurped and the sound of the smack echoed in Marcus Lucius's head. Cornelius wasn’t satisfied with Marcus Lucius's suggestion to reschedule the plan, but he proposed
to remain in the office as long as it was needed. Marcus Lucius had to definitely take over the command over the camp. Cornelius insisted to execute the plan as arranged with regards to the delay for Maxentius's recovery. It bought Marcus Lucius time to communicate with Appius and form his own plans.

  On the way back to the villa, Marcus Lucius was worried how to arrange the dinner with Julia so it didn't raise any suspicions when bringing Cornelius without any previous arrangements. The last thing she could expect was receiving a visitor. It was possible that she knew Cornelius already. Marcus Lucius never asked her about it, because he wasn't involved into Julia's family issues. He was never interested in stepping further in the level of ranks. He was happy in Thracia. There was enough space to feel free and unworried. Ignoring the wishes of his mother became a habit. In a very polite way, he used to answer her letters with greetings from a very satisfied person. Here, in Britannia, he felt good, too. He wasn't happy, because there were too many unknowns and too few obligations. He didn't feel good when he had nothing to do. He needed to come back to the soldier's routine. Maybe therefore, he liked the company of Cornelius. Cornelius was whiffy after the smell of army: the sweat of trained legionnaires, the wind and dust from the patrols around the village, the camp's rather not delicious kitchen. It was so well-known and worth aspiring to get it back. It made Marcus Lucius smile to his past and thought that he would maybe never be able to feel free and committed again.

  Especially one moment made Marcus Lucius nervous. As Cornelius looked at Marcus Lucius's hands, the older soldier said unexpectedly:

  -You're younger than I thought.

  Marcus Lucius briefly flinched a bit, but long enough to raise suspicion. The old commander didn't comment anything. It wasn't necessary. Then, he added surprisingly:

  -Julius didn't tell me much about you.

  Marcus Lucius was almost sure that the idea of pretending to be Maxentius was a complete flop. He was sure that the hint was a part of a series of checks to identify and confirm the real nature. Apparently, the puzzles of information that Cornelius had about Maxentius didn't match.

  -Everyone says it to me. - Marcus Lucius lied without batting an eye. - It's the marriage, I guess.

  Cornelius seemed to be relieved and somewhat happy about how the situation developed. Marcus Lucius judged that he was convincing enough. He couldn't remember Maxentius at all. He saw a dead, bloody body dressed according the status of a noble, Roman man. There hadn’t been enough time to look at the details and then, Marcus Lucius was too injured. He had never spoken about Maxentius with Julia or Appius's soldiers. It came to his mind only in the moment when Cornelius marked his hands. Marcus Lucius regretted that he didn't take it into consideration. It could disturb the entire plan. After waiting a moment, Marcus Lucius had the feeling that Cornelius was all right. He couldn't be sure about it, but his intuition that saved him from getting killed for years told him quietly to trust that Cornelius accepted the remark as being true.

  Fortunately, the statement didn't have any consequences. However, it was a bad sign and Marcus Lucius didn't want to risk nothing else. With an unsettled look, he went through the main room of the house, a broad, stony lobby, and gazed at Octavian every now and then. They didn't exchange a word, but they were both edgy.

  Julia stepped into the room covered in a blanket and with question marks in her eyes.

  -How did it go? - She asked and Octavian summarized the meeting with Cornelius.

  She hardly remembered the uncle, who was in Britannia for years already. As far as she knew, Cornelius rather stayed in Londonium, where he could easily take a ship and travel to Rome anytime. Octavian explained to her that Maxentius was supposed to take the leadership in Eboracum and Cornelius was there only temporary. The last tribune in Eboracum was killed in fights with local warriors. Generally, it was a safe area, but every now and then, some dangerous groups from North Britannia attacked Southern Britannia. Eboracum and Deva were the last camps located at the farthest ends of the empire. They marked the border and were left at the mercy of the more or less peaceful attitude of Barbarians.

  Julia shook her head, but nobody was able to understand what she really thought. As she heard the suggestion to prepare a dinner for her uncle, she stepped back two steps, as if her insecurity pushed her away from the place she stood in. She was more scared of her uncle coming into her house than the Barbarians that could attack any moment. Cornelius's presence was more perceptible in that moment. However, she understood the solemnity. After a moment of consideration, she spoke quietly with a trembling voice:

  -So, we'll prepare the dinner. My uncle wasn't present during the wedding, so he doesn’t know how Maxentius looked like.

  -Still, his soldiers could recognize Marcus Lucius, because he looks similar to his father. Maximus spent many years in Britannia and it's probable that one of Cornelius's guards will find out about our masquerade.

  Wearing a helmet in the lobby would raise too many questions. Additionally, nobody knew how to cover Marcus Lucius's face. Bandages were allowed, but inconvenient. The creepiness of the situation couldn't get worse in Julia's eyes. She had to put her mask of political correctness on and behave properly.

  -The only solution is having the dinner without Marcus Lucius. - Julia spoke aloud what nobody dared to say. - When he won't be here, he won't be recognized.

  Octavian wasn't convinced. Finally, Marcus Lucius was bandaged the same way he appeared at Cornelius’s. Octavian wasn't sure whether the meeting was a good idea. Too many bad consequences could follow and Octavian wasn't happy about it. He niggled:

  -How do we explain it all to Cornelius?

  -I simply say that the way up to here and today's talk was too exhausting for my husband. It's probable enough, isn't it?

  Marcus Lucius and Octavian kept silence. The first convinced man seemed to be Marcus Lucius.

  -It is. If it won't work, then we have to prepare an alternative plan. - Marcus Lucius said. - And don't forget the wine. I send a slave to bring as much wine as possible. Cornelius's glass should not get empty.

  An air of nervousness and insecurity was around during the entire afternoon. Marcus Lucius didn't agree to the plan until Julia asked him to trust her. He wasn't sure whether she was right, but she insisted to follow her plan. Marcus Lucius was able to fight against the entire world, but he wasn't able to start a fight with the girl. She had a strange kind of power that didn't allow him to oppose her. He would stop her, if her arguments wouldn't be powerful enough. Her short speech was logical and rational. There was no emotional issue. It was imposing.

  -How good do you know your uncle? - He asked her.

  -I don't know him at all. I heard about him. My father told some stories, but nothing worth mentioning it. - She answered slowly and using all words with purpose.

  She sounded strange as if she would be far, far away with her thoughts. Marcus Lucius didn't intend to push her. She told him the truth and it was crucial. He left her alone. She didn't notice it at first. As she brought up her father, she became nervous. She wasn't sure what to think about him. She wanted to be sure that Julius had given her to Maxentius with good intentions and not knowing how awful man Maxentius was. Finally, it was her father, a person whom she used to trust and she used to look up to him as if he was a kind of god. His decision was confusing and Julia struggled internally.

  As she couldn't see Marcus Lucius anywhere in the room, she was disappointed. She focussed on the preparation of the dinner and ignored any other thought. Chloe and Lysandra coordinated further slaves. The two women were Fabia's personal slaves, who were sent in an earlier convoy directly to Britannia to prepare everything according to Julia’s preferences. During the journey with Maxentius, Julia had only one assistance who was killed during the ambush near to Aquincium. Officially slaves did not have names, but it became fashionable to give them Greek names. 24-years old Chloe and 28-years old Lysandra were aware of Marcus Lucius pretending to be Maxentius. They already got
to know Maxentius and in their opinion, he was better for Julia than her real husband.

  While her slaves were busy, Julia had some free time. She didn't like it. Staying on her own caused many contemplations about things she didn't want to analyse. She looked for Marcus Lucius and found him talking with Octavian. Apparently, they discussed the possibilities for the evening. Their worst case scenario included a fight. Julia interrupted their talk by stepping into Marcus Lucius's room. He asked her to stay, but she backtracked politely. She wasn't willing to listen to any word about a fight. She became scared that she could die this evening. If Marcus Lucius's real identity would be discovered, he would be forced to appear at the bar. She didn't like to follow this thought. She wished to get distracted, but it didn't happen.

  The closer the evening drew, the more tensed Julia became. Marcus Lucius visited her in the suite she had chosen as her bedroom. He took the room next to her. Being near to her was important, not only because of fulfilling the plan.

  Marcus Lucius knocked on the walls and asked for permission to come in. She allowed him in. She sat in a wooden chair. Her red blanket covered her body and trembling fingers. Her eyes were unsettled. He asked her whether she was really sure that she wanted to execute her plan. She nodded with determination in her eyes. However, her fingers trembled. He minded her strength, but argued he would stay in her direct proximity, just in case. He stepped forward and came so close to the chair that he could stretch his hand and touch her anytime he wanted.

  -Look me in the eye, Julia. - He whispered, bowed over her a bit and her chaotic look got directed to him. His hands landed on her shoulders and she quivered as a negative reaction to a sudden touch. He eased his already gentle grasp as he noticed her reflex. - You can do this. I am here for you.

  She nodded automatically and her eyes went hurriedly from his eyes to her shoulders. She didn't feel comfortable with the unexpected touch. Marcus Lucius stepped back and gave her the free space. She appreciated the move. She still wasn't completely convinced about his intentions. Her heart told her to trust him. Her mind suggested staying cautious. His care could have many reasons. Julia would analyse it now, if she wouldn't be nervous about the upcoming dinner with her uncle. She already had some scary visions of the plan going wrong.

  -Your idea is good. - Marcus Lucius said gently, calmly. - And if you need me, I am not so far away as you think. I am here for you.

  She trembled further, so he slapped her smooth on the back like he already did with his soldiers. He wasn't sure whether it was appropriate or not. He never had to cheer up a girl before, and he didn't intend to send wrong signals. He simply wanted to show his support. It wasn't helpful and didn't change Julia's objections. She still was shaky.

  -If anything happens, do what you have to do to protect yourself. Have no regard for my feelings. Do you understand?

  She didn't react, so he kneeled down in front of her. His hand touched her cheek and directed her face towards him so that Julia had to look at him. When he was sure that her eyes were focussed on him, he repeated:

  -Julia, it's important that you stay safe. You can say whatever you want and need to protect yourself. Do you understand? - His tone was clear, gentle, but communicated an important message.

  Julia nodded finally, even though she didn't seem to be convinced about the validity of his words. He thought she wouldn’t manage it and he didn't judge her for it.

  -We abort the plan. - He decided and wanted to leave the room to inform Octavian about it.

  -No! - She opposed. - With all due respect, together we persevere.

  The change in her face was obvious. She won back her energy.

  -Promise me that you protect yourself without any regard to me or Appius's men. - Marcus Lucius repeated once again the last statement, because he wasn't sure whether she really got it or just reacted the way he expected. She nodded and said angrily “Fine, fine!”

  Her eyes were sad, angry, unsettled, but her face showed no fear at all. She wanted to add something, but the words stayed in her throat. She coughed shortly and stood up hastily. The entire situation wasn't comfortable to her. She felt like a hunted animal. She went to a pillar on the left side of the room. Marcus Lucius stood up, but didn't follow her. He wasn't sure whether he was supposed to move closer or leave her enough space to breath freely.

  Suddenly, Julia's slave Lysandra, came into the room and announced the arrival of Cornelius. For a short moment Julia trembled more extreme. Then, she took a deep breath and straightened her back. Her blanket fell down to the ground and Marcus Lucius saw a long, pleated, wonderful, blue garment inspired by the clothing of ancient Greece with sleeves reaching up to Julia's hands. It was girt with dark blue ribbons and two belts in the same colour. One was below the breasts creating a great amount of folds and the second belt was worn around the waist. It was made of silk, and therefore, didn't warm the body. Marcus Lucius noticed that Julia was a frost bite and he knew that she already started feeling cold. However, she didn't tremble anymore. In this moment, she was a powerful, proud woman. She left the room without any word and without looking at him. Marcus Lucius wasn't sure how she was. She had a polite face expression he never saw before.

  He was worried about her, not about himself. It was irrelevant that he was in danger. He appreciated her help and therefore, she should stay protected. His life was more or less over. The matter of vengeance was not crucial right now. The living beings had higher priority than the dead ones.

  He sent the second servant of Julia, Chloe, to support Lysandra supervising her. It wasn't clever to harken at the pillars, when Cornelius's guards were in the house. When Julia already announced that her husband didn't feel well, then it wasn't supportive to catch the husband on eavesdropping. It wouldn't make a good impression. Therefore, Marcus Lucius stayed in Julia's room and waited for her to come back after the dinner.

  During the following two hours, he waited impatiently for news. The only good issue was that Julia was definitely supervised by Octavian. Even if Octavian was sometimes annoying, he was a reliable, trustworthy person. If Appius trusted Octavian, then Marcus Lucius had to do the same. Octavian proved that he could act against the mainstream, but still be responsible and correct. Marcus Lucius remembered the wound on the chest that Octavian burnt once. It was painful, but a needed support for the healing process. Marcus Lucius noticed that Octavian liked Julia. He observed her very cautiously, but with the special note in his eyes. As far as Marcus Lucius understood, Octavian didn't speak a lot with Julia. Marcus Lucius wasn't sure why. Still, he felt certain that Octavian would protect Julia at any price and not just because it was his task.

  In the meanwhile, Julia greeted her uncle. She didn't know him at all and saw him for the very first time. Not only his belly was round like a ball, his cheeks, nose and fingers were like potatoes. His handshake was strong, but he seemed to get around women a lot, because he bored in mind how powerful his squeeze was. He smiled politely, which reminded Julia of her father, who smiled in a similar way at the visitors he didn't like.

  Julia kept her friendly smile upon her lips, even though internally she felt very insecure. She stretched her hand towards him and welcomed him in her house.

  -Excuse my husband.... - She started softly. Then, she explained the situation and waited for Cornelius's reaction.

  He waited for her to end the sentence and observed her attentively. He nodded minimally with his head as a sign of understanding, but his special polite smile stayed for a while. He took her hand and squeezed it strongly as like an eagle that caught a fish in its claws. As he noticed that his pressure seemed to be too strong, he smiled inconveniently and backed off. She didn't change her facial expression, but internally, she felt relieved. She didn't like the frightening pickle and had already considered screaming for Marcus Lucius. She was sure that he would appear within the blink of an eye. It calmed her down. He was right that his proximity made her feel more secure and comfortable. She wondered whether Marcus
Lucius's handshake would be so strong, too. He tried not to hurt her. Cornelius had no feeling for the delicate and soft skin of the girl or intended to threat her. Either way, she didn't like it.

  Julia kept silent and didn't add any further word, and he noticed how she ordered to bring in the wine without speaking at all. He appreciated her silent way of being.

  -You're a worthwhile daughter of your father. - Cornelius said finally as he sat down in a wooden, comfortable chair. He drank wine nosily.

  -Sit down, Julia. - He ordered politely.

  She followed his words. The dinner was served. Cornelius ate quickly with munching. Julia limited herself to a few chewing attempts, because she was too nervous to eat. Her goose pimples could indicate many different things. Even if Julia didn't have the impression that Cornelius observed her, she was sure he watched her every move. The more she stayed in his company, the more she was convinced about similarities between him and her father. Julius Fabius used to eat quickly, too. And he always kept his eyes on everything happening around him.

  After the dinner spent rather in silence than with small talk, Cornelius stood up and took another glass of wine. He came to Julia and requested a walk through the house. She nodded with politely, even though she didn’t have a clue what he intended to do next. After his rather usual statements like “The house looks uninhabited, but you will surely change the impression soon” or “You just arrived and it's understandable that there is no personal touch to feel here”, Cornelius's facial expression changed. They were alone. His soldiers stayed in the lobby, while Cornelius and Julia went out into the yard. They could be easily observed, but nobody could listen to their talk. From that moment on, the old guy with grey, short hair on his round head looked rather sorrowed and imminent.

  -Are you really doing fine?

  His question was straight and unexpected. Julia nodded fast what convinced him about the truthfulness of her answer.

  -I heard about a lot Maxentius and today I met him for the first time. - Cornelius confided silently. - I don't believe in love changing our true nature, so I am deeply confused whether the man I got to know is the man I heard of. Therefore, you need to confess me the truth.

  Julia trembled a little, but she smiled friendly. It was a real smile, not the put-on-reflex. She thought about Marcus Lucius, who took care about her and ordered her even own extradition when needed. It was a moving gesture of him, because she knew that his will of revenge was strong. Apparently, she was more important at that time and it made her happy. It improved her mood during the whole evening. It gave her the power to stay polite and strong.

  Cornelius saw the sparks in her eyes, but he wasn't convinced completely. The person described as Maxentius couldn't make Julia happy. He heard a lot of stories from many different sources and there was a shadow of doubt in his mind. He wasn't an emotional man. He was a man of logic and rational decisions. The probability that Maxentius has changed so extremely was low. Today, he met a man with a strong, clear handshake. Today, he met a man who exuded a self-confidence that Cornelius knew from earned men with experience on the battlefield. Already by the arrival and a short movement of Maxentius's head, Cornelius recognized an experienced, well-trained soldier, a good leader, a noticeable man. It didn't suit the description delivered by Julius Fabius or any other source. Maxentius wasn't famous for any military action. On the opposite, he used to be released from the military service, even though the fact was adverted in a more proper, politically correct way. Therefore, Cornelius wondered how it was possible to dismiss a man of such a strong presence. Additionally, Maxentius's answers were short in the typical way for Roman commanders. His skin appeared younger than Cornelius had estimated. Maxentius was hardly younger than Julius Fabius. There were many question marks connected with the person of Maxentius and Cornelius wasn't sure about all answers.

  His eyes had a kind of worried tone that Julia had seen twice in her father's eyes. It wasn't faked sorrow. For the first time during the evening, he was really honest and open towards her. She needed to give him a reason not to analyse this problem any further. It could lead to discovery of the fact that Maxentius wasn't alive, that Maxentius was played by Marcus Lucius.

  -If anything goes wrong, you have my word that I will come to you and report it. - She promised.

  -I keep your word, but I have to be double sure in this matter. Your father ordered me to take care of you and therefore, I have to leave a part of my legion with you. - He sounded rather like a worried father than a provisional commander of a camp. - I know you lost many of your servants and I appreciate the help of Appius, but I need to have my man here to be able to sleep calmly through the nights.

  Actually, he was more interested in observing Maxentius than keeping an eye on Julia. His anticipation of good luck told him that he had to stay on course to get to know the secret he smelled in the air. The result could influence his political career he tried to pimp up since years.

  His words sounded personally, but Julia suspected she was playing with fire. She didn't want to destroy the more or less pretended trust he had towards her, but she felt she had to support Marcus Lucius, and Appius, and Nerva, and Octavian, any everyone who covered the arrangement up to now.

  She didn't like the powerful request to leave his soldiers here. It wasn't polite and it definitely limited her freedom. Unfortunately, she wasn't able to find any arguments against the suggestion. It complicated her situation, but she couldn't analyse the whole impact within the few seconds she had. She was sure that Cornelius would take his men back, if he would get the impression that everything was fine. He could use his force like an eagle uses its claws to catch a fish and drop it into his own nest. She could feel the same as a desert tortoise with a high, patterned shell that enables the animal to successfully survive in arid conditions. However, the shell can be broken by a larger bird picking up a small turtle and, flying high, dropping the victim on the rocks below, breaking the turtle's shell like an egg. She didn't know the custom of desert birds, but she was aware of the dangerous position she was in. Life is tough not only in the desert. The last thing she wanted was to provoke any confrontation or to raise any objection. Therefore, she friendly thanked for Cornelius's care and accepted his politely formed order. He seemed to be relieved. It was a good sign.

  -I am sure my husband will speak his credits to you when he'll get better.

  It was a sign for Cornelius to say goodbye. He indeed did so and left the house shortly after they came back into the villa. Octavian was unsettled, when not all of Cornelius's soldiers left the building. He wasn't sure what was going on, but there was no occasion to ask Julia directly about this issue.

  Julia watched with a friendly smile how Cornelius left the mansion and she moved her head with a gesture of saluting to the soldiers who stayed at her side. One of them stepped forward and introduced himself as Vinicius Balbus. He resembled Nerva: dark hair, nice eyes, friendly, but dirty smile on the lips. He was the commander of the troop of soldiers left by Cornelius to watch over Julia and her family. He had the same function like Octavian had. Strangely enough, they were on different ends of a stick and looked at the same situation from different perspectives with different background knowledge. Octavian reported later that Vinicius was a skilled soldier, already married. It was rather an obligation than a relationship. He sent his rent as payoff for his three kids, but he wasn't really interested in their education. He had two boys and he waited until they reached the age of 15. Then, he wanted them to start service in the army. Until then, he could enjoy a few years free from family sorrows and controversy with his wife. His future was clear and predictable. He focussed on Cornelius’s orders and nothing else. Vinicius took his task seriously.

  Julia got a headache from trying to keep her fears under control. She excused herself and wanted to leave the lobby. On the way to her room, she noticed she was followed by Vinicius. Apparently, he was supposed to be her private bodyguard. She didn't like the idea at all. She fe
lt scared and unwell when he followed her every step. As she went into the room which was chosen as Marcus Lucius's bedroom, she didn't find him there. She was angry and confused. She left it and noticed the doubts in Vinicius look. It wasn't a good sign what he had written on his face. Quickly, she went to her own room and sighted relieved when she saw Marcus Lucius sitting on the bed. The shadow of Vinicius on her back was shameless.

  -Who do you bring to us, Julia? - Marcus Lucius spoke gently. His head was hidden in his hands, so nobody could recognize his face. In the moment, he heard the steps of two people, he stayed motionless.

  She stopped and wondered how he could hear the silent steps of Vinicius. It was a riddle to her how Marcus Lucius could distinguish people by their steps. Even if she tried to focus hard, she couldn’t even get when Octavian or her servants stepped into the room. Marcus Lucius was a master in this area. Even Octavian valued it with the highest respect.

  -Are you in pain? - She was shocked by the picture she saw. Her voice was full of sorrow. She came to him and kneeled down in front of him. She looked him in the eyes and he was completely focussed on her look. Her hands landed on his knees, because she had to steady herself somehow.

  -Are you fine? - He asked silently. He seemed to be in ok.

  She nodded hastily.

  -Send the soldier away. - He ordered quietly.

  She nodded again.

  -It's Vinicius Balbus from my uncle's legion. He and a part of his legion are at our disposal thanks to the generosity of Cornelius. - She spoke loudly and clearly.

  Vinicius moved a little unsure how to handle the situation.

  -May we then speak tomorrow, if they are staying here? Feel free in this house, Vinicius, but leave our bedchamber. - Marcus Lucius said then louder, without changing his position.

  Vinicius nodded with understanding and left the room. The tension in Julia's body decreased immediately. Before she fell to the ground from the relief, Marcus Lucius grasp her arms. She sat down on the stony floor and breathed shortly, heavily. Her panic attack begun abruptly and she suffered triggered by a situation from which she was not able to escape.

  -Breath slowly, calm down. - Marcus Lucius repeated, but even his gentle voice didn't help. He wondered how she could fall apart so quickly. In one moment, she was proud, powerful and self-controlled, in the next, her whole facade was destroyed within a second. It was just like taking a tortoise out of its hard, rough, independent shell. Her armour fell apart and she was unprotected. Marcus Lucius was sorrowed that something happened to her. Although she nodded as answer to the question whether she was fine, she didn't look that way. He wasn't sure how to behave. He had to stay away from her in order not to develop any deeper emotion. He was at her side only for a short time. He had to step away after the circumstances were settled anew. The more he tried to hold the line, the more tension it caused internally. He wasn't able to retreat himself completely, even if his surface showed no emotions. His eyes were burning with thousands of shades of his heart's struggles. She impressed him more and more. He never felt that way towards any female being. His influential mother was a powerful person, but she didn’t have so much grace and innocence in her presence. It attracted him and at the same time, it caused his increasing need to keep the distance. She had a magic, almost saint aura, a crucial ingredient of her subtle, luminous presence.

  Marcus Lucius stepped forward and knelt next to her. He didn't let her arm go.

  -Give me a moment. - She stuttered without looking at him. - Just a moment...

  He wasn't sure what to do next. She was shaky like jelly, but denied any kind of touch, help or attention. Fortunately, her panic attack passed by and she took her arms away from him. Automatically, he relaxed his grasp so that she was able to sit more comfortably on the floor. He didn't like her to stay in this position, because she wasn't a servant, or any kind of defeated being. He sat down next to her intuitively.

  She tried to tell him what happened during the evening. With broken sentences and hasty breaths, she explained what Cornelius had said to her. She was honest and didn't leave out any aspect of her private conversation. However, she didn't share her motives with him. She simply used Appius as an excuse for her reasons. She wasn't able to be straight with him about her feelings.

  Marcus Lucius appreciated the range of trust she shared with him. Only after her summary, he was able to reconstruct how much tension she must have had to keep in her fragile body in the last hours. Even though she didn't make the most energetic impression at that moment, because her hands were sweaty, and her body was shaky, her power was uncanny.

  She sat on the cold floor for a while. It seemed to be a safe place for her, where she wanted to stay. He didn't intend to interrupt or destroy her fragile moment of peace. Therefore, he stood up and brought her a blanket. She was a frost bite and he already knew it. He covered her with it and lifted her up. Then, he laid her on the bed.

  -I have to talk with Octavian. He doesn't know the details yet. - Marcus Lucius whispered.

  Julia nodded without even looking at him. She didn't want him to leave, but she understood his reasons. She waited patiently until he came back. It didn't take long. Men could compress their communication to a minimum. He walked into the room in the same inconspicuously way like he left it. From the very first moment, he noticed that she didn't fall asleep at all. He sat on the edge of the bed and watched how she finally fell asleep. Her hands didn't stop shivering. Her eye lids moved minimally. He stroked her hair to calm her down and she indeed became less nervous. It worked successfully. Her tension decreased. At the same time, it calmed him down, too. While she was sleeping, he thought that she rescued him for the second time. He thought he didn't deserve such a good fortune. Nobody should risk his own life for him and she already did it for the second time.

  From that day on, he started watching over her. He was still enlisted as wounded, but he could and had to start with his training. He had to protect her, even from herself, if it was needed. She should not have to rescue him again. She was too good for the world and he didn't want her to pay his dues. He knew that he had to keep his distance to Julia as Appius ordered. It was the best solution for everybody. He wasn't even sure what Julia felt for him. He wasn't sure about her reasons. Maybe she was simply following Appius’s orders. It wasn't easy to break through her surface.

  As she was sleeping, he sat down more comfortably with the back to the wall. She lay next to him and breathed more regularly. When he stopped stroking her hair, she changed her position: she laid with the back curved forward, the legs brought up as tightly against the belly as possible, the head bowed as close to the chest as possible, and the arms wrapped around the head. She looked rather like a red, wool ball than a human being. Marcus Lucius wondered why she did it. He never saw such a behaviour before. He wasn't aware that sometimes, when a person has suffered extreme physical or psychological trauma, they will assume the foetal position to prevent further stress. Marcus Lucius didn’t have any idea what healthy, instinctual background this position provided: it was a better protection to the brain and vital organs when the brain was no longer able to cope with the surrounding environment, and in essence "shuts down" temporarily. Today, we would compare it with the sleeping modus of a computer, but at that time, Marcus Lucius couldn't expect to get any psychological explanation for it. For his mental horizon, people around him were influenced by gods while acting or thinking, if their actions weren't explainable.

  From that night on, he spent every night in Julia's room sleeping while sitting next to her with his back to the wall, after watching how long she needed to fall asleep and analysing her reactions from the day that just passed by.

  Before she went to bed, she waited for him to free his torso. Every evening, she cleaned his wounds and rubbed in the substances that Octavian got from the medico. Nerva brought some other substances with herbal issues given with good wishes to get well soon from Appius. The hour of intimacy was a nice time to spend, eve
n if they both, Julia and Marcus Lucius, tried not to show any emotions. There was a sexual tension that they tried to minimize. The emphasis was put on the mechanic movements with the pure intent to improve the healing process. At the back of their minds, they didn't dare to proceed any further with sexual thoughts. They knew their obligations, their limits and the respect they felt for each other. The short, rare moments, when their eyes met, and when the bodily reactions showed prohibited temptations, were precious and impermissible.

  Julia wasn't sure how Marcus Lucius would react to her wishes. Therefore, she avoided to talk with him about anything: from a purchase of winter dresses, over his behaviour up to his thoughts. To confirm the impression that they were happily married and not to raise the attention of Cornelius, they spent the nights in a common chamber. Sometimes, they thought independently from each other that Cornelius's attention was just an excuse for them to spend time together. It calmed Julia down, even if they didn't touch each other. Marcus Lucius waited for her after she took a bath and he gave her enough space to avoid anything that could annoy her. She didn't feel harassed at all, on the opposite: she felt safe. She became familiarized with him being the last person she saw when she fell asleep and the first one, she saw when she woke up. He kept his distance and she followed the same strategy. She was sure that he still loved his wife and conducted the steps prescribed by Appius. In an unspoken way, she found a very specific friend in him.

  With time, she noticed that Marcus Lucius surprisingly paid attention and observed how she behaved. He knew that she was trembling from the wet, cold weather; he brought new blankets and covered her at nights, when she moved in sleep. He brought her a bowl with water for the morning washing procedure, even though he could leave this task for the slaves. She wasn't sure whether it was his own idea because he cared about her, whether it was a part of Appius's orders or a spontaneous idea to improve the strategy to pretend a good marriage. It was complicated and the analysis of so many issues occupied Julia for days.

  She didn’t feel good being observed by Cornelius's soldiers. She wasn't sure how long it would take until they could send the Cornelius's legionnaires back. Vinicius stayed by her side from the moment she left her chamber up to the moment, she returned there to find shelter. Vinicius didn't overstep the border to her room anymore. The short words spoken by Marcus Lucius were reason enough to leave the couple at least the piece of privacy on the bedroom. Cornelius's other soldiers followed Marcus Lucius. During the days, he left Julia alone with Vinicius and started going out. Outside, he wore a helmet that hid his face and made him unrecognisable. It was important that Marcus Lucius didn't attract attention and didn't raise any questions about his identity. He was supposed to play the role of Maxentius. He did it well.

  At first, he took walks. Octavian wasn't satisfied with Marcus Lucius's efforts and found it too strenuously to exercise so soon with fresh wounds. However, he accompanied Marcus Lucius who was determined to start exercising. Together, they walked towards the woods, then they went along the line of trees. Finally, they reached the moors in Southern North. They changed direction and went some hundred meters towards the West and came back to the villa from the North-Western side. They were followed by three or four of Cornelius’s legionnaires, even though they kept their distance.

  At first the walk took the whole day due to many pauses. In the first days they walked for almost twenty to twenty five kilometres. Octavian niggled every time they left the mansion and it was rather a sign of care than complaining about exertions. For him, the walks were rather a nice diversion or supplement to the normal trainings. Nerva, if he was in the villa, took it more easy and with humour. Therefore, Marcus Lucius preferred to go out with Nerva. They could talk every now and then, but mostly, they just savoured the silence of woods and the green, wet nature around them.

  Later, Marcus Lucius wanted to discuss this and that with Octavian. There were so many possibilities to talk about so many things. But instead, they kept silent and Octavian breathed heavily, because he was slightly offended by the fact that Marcus Lucius didn't listen to anyone. Marcus Lucius's wounds could break open easily after too much exercise. At the beginning his breath was regular but started being irregular when they reached the tenth kilometre. His hands weren't sweaty, but his back was wet and he could get easily cold or catch a fever or chest symptoms. However, pneumonia was regarded as "the captain of the men of death" by William Osler in the 19th century only. In Roman times, it wasn't known that infectious agents include bacteria, viruses, fungi, and parasites. There was no antibiotic therapy that radically improved the survival of infections. There were undefined, invisible, moody gods, who decided spontaneously who would survive and who would die. It was like in today's third world that pneumonia remained a leading cause of death no matter of the age. Octavian didn't raise the topic of death rates and more care about the own health, because it wasn't supportive to Marcus Lucius. Therefore, Octavian was totally unsatisfied about the trips they made.

  Normally, he would appreciate the walks through woods, because it was indeed relaxing and kept him in shape. He didn’t like to be involved in the first line of attack on the battlefield. He rather stayed at the back and waited for the last offenders, who would break the lines of defence. It wasn't easy to stay calm and look powerful when the soldiers you knew were fighting. He was seen as the last man standing.

  Then, he didn't like the Britannia. He preferred the warm lands of the Roman Empire. There, he could sleep during the nights without needing a blanket. There, he could eat meat the way he loved it. Britannia was just good for two reasons. One, he appreciated the trust of Appius. This mission was the best proof that Octavian was the solid, reliable man, he always wanted to be. Two, he was close to Julia. He was entranced by her from the very first moment he saw her. She was Appius’s guest, who practically hosted an old friend and new husband in one person. Octavian heard some stories about Maxentius's miserable army career. There was a story that Maxentius held a sword like a girl. There was another story that Maxentius was scared to death when he was supposed to go to his first battle. When Octavian saw Maxentius for the very first time, he noticed the extremely tender, but wrinkled skin of a man, who dabbled with battles, but had enough power to beat a weak and defenceless being. Octavian had already seen beaten women, while they rested as a team in different places. He noticed women visiting their man, soldiers, who were stationed in camps, and overreacting after days or weeks of broken contact to their families. Octavian observed how much these women suffered in silence, how their eyes became dashed off and how their moves lost the vigorous dynamic. The same symptoms, he noticed with Julia. She still had a kind of fire, but it wasn't a fire that could burn for ages. Instinctively, he wanted to protect her. His first reflex was to kill the man, who was supposed to watch over his own wife. Affected by unexpected emotions, Octavian got shaky hands. He noticed that Appius registered the tension, but not the reason behind it. Sending Octavian as the leader of the convoy to Britannia could have two different explanations. Either Appius knew what really happened in Octavian's mind and wanted to him to learn a lesson or Appius knew that of all soldiers, Octavian would fulfil his task with the strongest motivation. Either way, it showed Appius's trust in Octavian.

  After a month, the walk took just the half the time and Marcus Lucius started his first trainings in the back yard, when he came back to villa after noon. The signs of autumn were already present outside and it wasn't clever to leave the villa for a longer while, if it wasn't necessary. The days became shorter and the amount of water in the air increased. It was too unpleasant outside. The danger of slipping combined with the probability of the wounds getting worse was too high. For that reason, Marcus Lucius shortened the march distance and spent more time in the inner yard, where he trained at least three hours a day. Octavian welcomed it.

  At first Marcus Lucius didn't use the sword. He started with stretching exercises and then, he simulated the moves known from battles. H
e tried to rest a little, when he noticed the pain in his chest. It was the best signal to slacken off and reduce the tempo he decreed for himself. Walking was easy, but the real training was demanding. Still, he loved it and needed to feel the exertion of the day. He tried not to get any muscle ache, but he liked the state of being positively tired. With every day, his moves got more dynamic and fluent as they used to be. He wasn't walking like a beaten goat, but like a young lion, who was preparing himself for the hunt. Cornelius's stayed in the background, observed his methods and exercises. After two weeks of his practise, one of the soldiers, Rufus, asked whether he could train with Marcus Lucius. He nodded.

  Rufus was approximately of Nerva’s age. His hair was short and black. His face was rough and round like the full moon, even though his body wasn't fat. He had the young vigorous will to participate in any kind of movement. The rest of the team stayed disinterested, satisfied that they didn't have to walk for hours through the woods. Marcus Lucius shortly talked to Octavian a couple of times and they both noticed that Cornelius's legionnaires preferred to stay unmoved. They were simply lazy and too fat compared to soldiers Marcus Lucius saw in other camps. They quickly ran out of breath and needed more time to rest than a wounded man. After Rufus, Commodus wished to take part in the trainings, they organised duels, but Marcus Lucius couldn't train optimally, because Cornelius's men weren't trained well enough. He turned more into a teacher. It was disappointing. He increased the time for warming up and thought about a long-term solution for the situation.

  Sometimes, Octavian moved forward and crossed his sword with Marcus Lucius's. They didn't exert at all, it was rather a foreplay of a duel, but it was fascinating how good they were. Cornelius's men stood and gazed at the purposely slowed down movements of the two soldiers. It was a spectacle worth watching. They reported to Cornelius that Maxentius wasn't in his best form yet, but he became a valuable warrior. Cornelius analysed whether it was possible that Maxentius had changed not due to the marriage, but due to the new task. Maybe he really wanted to build up a new reputation and therefore, he buckled down for it. He wanted to impress his new family and the world. It was a good motivation, definitely.

  Cornelius regretted that he couldn't follow Maxentius's trainings personally. Every now and then, he could drop by on a pretext, but he could not observe the trainings. However, his legionnaires were present and he received daily reports and was best-informed about Maxentius's improvements. The new husband of Julia started to be a variable in the equation. It could be dangerous or beneficial.

  Marcus Lucius assumed that Cornelius made his own plans related to the person of Maxentius. Some of Cornelius's thoughts were easy to follow, others weren’t. What occupied Marcus Lucius’s mind, was Julia. She was more perceptible, closer, visible. From the very beginning, she observed his training, always staying in the background. He felt her eyes on him and it made him feel good. He definitely liked her silent attention. It reassured him that she was near and safe. She spread the calmness that he needed during the training. Every time he perceived her tension or a sudden movement, he looked at her and checked what was going on. He wasn't disturbed by the unknown faces of Cornelius's soldiers or knowing that Octavian was just a few meters away. But he got tensed immediately when Julia moved hastily. Even though she was so far away that he wasn't able to read her facial expression in detail, he was still able to notice whether she was tensed or not.

  As he was walking, she stayed in the house and used to hide out from everyone. Almost every day, she covered herself in two blankets and thought about Homer's worlds full of heroes and special beings. She declaimed passages of the epics in Greek and showed extremely understanding for the language of Homer. However, she was all alone with her Magna Graecia issues. It was very comfortable for her. She lived in her own world and isolated herself continuously. While Marcus Lucius was in training, she crept up on the kitchen's window board and observed what happened in the back yard with a quite dreamy, absent look. When Marcus Lucius looked around and tried to catch her look, she didn't react, even if he gazed at her in an extremely flashy way. When she realized it, she tried to distract herself. Watching his increasingly flowing movements reminded her how he fought during the ambush. His dynamic was full of beauty and dignity. It was a pleasure to watch him moving.

  What she didn't like were the gazes of the Cornelius's soldiers. They sometimes had this special shadow in their eyes that she already knew from Maxentius. She didn't feel comfortable with it, so she moved her head away. Sometimes, she even fled into the house and didn't reappear for a longer while. She was angry, because she couldn't do anything against it. She wasn't able to protect herself and this powerlessness caused her frustration. She wished to be able to move a sword at least in self-defence.

  Marcus Lucius noticed that Octavian checked what Julia was doing on the kitchen's window board every now and then. He appreciated this, because he knew that her well-being was important to Octavian. When she came into a room where Octavian was or when she left it, he noticed how Octavian followed her moves from the very beginning till the very end. He tried not to attract attention with his spying techniques, so Marcus Lucius didn't say a word about it. Knowing that one of Appius's men was directly next to Julia insured him she was almost as good protected as by him. Her body's and soul's health were crucial to him.

  When Marcus Lucius was outside the villa, and when the days were rarely sunny and it didn't rain too strong, Julia climbed through her bedroom's window and sat down next to the chimney pot on the roof and looked at the landscape outside. The villa was the last mansion of the settlements of houses near to the Roman camp for legionnaires in Eboracum. The yard bordered the woods and the view from this side of the house was stunning. A dynamic sea of trees echoing with the chanting birds and running wind combined with millions of totally different and changeable clouds in the sky made a her think of different things. Only here, she was able to admire the nature of Britannia. Even when it started raining while she sat with the back to the chimney pot, she was kind of happy to be there. She enjoyed the moments so close to the sky and so far away from the ground. It was her moment of freedom. She allowed herself to stay there as long as Marcus Lucius was outside on his walking tour. He wasn't supposed to realise her absence. In case she didn’t notice him coming back into the villa, Chloe was supposed to alarm her immediately. Captured in dreams and inhaling the pure beauty of nature, Julia was often lost in thoughts.